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Archive for March, 2008

bio-ego.jpgStole this hook,line and sinker from the why blog…. It is a great way at looking at how we react to life’s circumstances. (Thanks Amy for an eye opening post!)

Because I’m dense when it comes to the non-physical. Examples and tools are what help me put the intangible into a perspective that can be used on a daily basis. And once again, Eckhart Tolle was full of great examples in the online class with Oprah for the Chapter Four of “A New Earth,” titled “Role-Playing: The Many Faces of the Ego.”

This is the first week that I did not try to log onto the Monday night class at www.Oprah.com, because I was tired. Last week I watched it on Monday night and found myself unable to go to sleep until after midnight. Tuesday morning at 6 am came too early (I’m one of those must have 8 hours of sleep kind). So thinking that watching it Tuesday at noon would allow me to absorb more won out. Well, I’m less tired today but I did miss that Christmas morning excitement I felt when logging on at night for the live event.

Either way, I’m so glad to have watched it. Each week brings more insight into how the ego impedes happiness and what to do about it. There were so many examples or faces of the ego covered but here is what was talked about that really affected me.

Eckhart said – Power is within. If you are not present you don’t know this. So you will try to get if from others.

This seemed to sum up to me why I was always wanting. Wanting stuff. Wanting more. Wanting something from someone. We are always searching for that power outside ourselves which can only be found inside and therefore we are never satisfied.

Eckhart told a story of what this Zen master said about an athlete. “That His Need to Win Drains his Power.”

Anybody who has played sports knows this is the case. When you aren’t thinking and you are completely focused on that moment, you do well. When you think too much, or psych yourself out, you don’t do well.

Eckhart went onto say that you should focus on the small steps each day and find joy in them, (you know where you ultimately want to end up) otherwise once you get it you won’t be worth it because you didn’t enjoy getting there.

Many people called in with questions and Oprah did a great job of asking the laymen questions for us! Like how do you stay in that present state of consciousness (that many have and can achieve while meditating or sitting quietly) while your child is screaming or your boss is yelling at you?

Again he had wonderful examples – the one that struck me the most was when he said – practice being transparent. Instead of being a wall when these assaults hit you, allow them to flow through you.

I loved his statement that – True freedom is when your inner state is no longer dependent on external conditions. He told one caller that her daughter’s screaming was not the problem – it was her reaction. This hit home (as a mother). I never looked at it like the problem was mine not my daughter’s. Another wow moment!

Continuing with being a mother. They talked about not being identified with the LABEL of MOTHER. That we should fulfill our functions; looking after, guiding, etc. But not becoming completely identified so that the function doesn’t become a role.

I got 2 things from this line of thought:

1-By losing our whole self in the role of Mother, it will take away from my being present in other situations and relationships – friend, wife, daughter, aunt etc.

2- Eckhart talked about identifying with the role, a mother will stay in that function with their children even when they are grown. This is why some Mothers still feel the need to tell their grown children what to do and treat them as though they were still small. Ultimately, this will impede my enjoying all of the stages of my daughter’s life.

Oprah went on to clarify that parenting changes as the child grows. I’m seeing this as my daughter approaches 12 yrs old. We now have issues that we didn’t when she was younger. Something I need to work on. Which Eckhart said something along the lines of it starts with me. All my relationships can change depending on my “BEING” and my reactions.

It was truly the most example filled and take-home-tools-for-every-day-life filled class yet!

The class ended with Oprah asking Eckhart how he could some up this chapter and he said – Balancing the human & the being. Functioning while rooted in being. Having constant peace in the background.

Aaahhh, I look forward to that – but I will try to find joy in the steps getting there!

I look forward to next week!

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